New Years!

Another 12 months, 52 weeks, 365 days, 8760 hours, 525,600 minutes of struggle, fun, progress, love, pain, growth, and experience. I intend to make the best of it!


That is my current Facebook status. And I meant every word! I'm so excited for this year, I can hardly stand it. It started perfect!
I went to a party with Lisette, her date, and of course, Batman. It was HUGE!! There were so many people, it was amazing. I loved it. Batman gave me the perfect New Years kiss, and we welcomed the year dancing outside in the cold to Argyle. Perfection. Beauty. Love. I couldn't ask for anything more.
And now..
My resolution!!!
My New Years Resolution is to make a new resolution every month. I don't want to make a year-long goal for two reasons:
1. It won't last.
2. It won't last.
Seriously, I mean it. I actually want to improve, so I want a goal that I can keep. For January, my goal is to work out regularly. Nothing too challenging, just enough that I can feel healthy and be active. Not to lose weight, 'cause I'm skinny, but just to be a better me. As the year progresses, I'll make new resolutions based on how I feel I need to improve. I think it will work out great. I really want to change for the better. :D
I'm so excited for this year! Last year there were some intense ups and downs. Somewhere around 5 deaths on my Mom's side.. Definite down. Batman.. Definite up. I'm so happy lately, it's almost stupid! I'm positively giddy with cheer. (: I've been super optimistic lately, and just.. Smiley. I love feeling like this. I love every moment I spend with Batman, and my friends. I love all the new people I've met, the new things I've tried. I love me. (:
And now.. I think I've said enough. I wish you all a very wonderful 2011, and hope you can see the best in everything around you!!
Xoxo,
Stellar Meadow (:

Argyle and Us Thieves in Concert!!!

THIS FRIDAY there is a show. A show every single one of you should come to. Click on these photos to see their profiles on Facebook and Reverbnation! Please.. If you love me. (:


"Argyle" on facebook.


"Argyle" on reverbnation.

Listen to their music. Please. What they have uploaded is just a taste of the real thing. They are so fantastic! And I'm sure you will love them as much as I do. (:

One last link: This is the event on facebook. All the information to come see this amazing group play- free! And if you become a fan, you can be in on all future events, too. Pleeease just take a peek! I can promise you won't regret it! Then come back here, and let me know what you think. You can comment on this post, or email me. Just let me know what you think so I can pass it on to the band!

They hope to have 1,000 fans on facebook by New Years. I think they could do it- but they need your help! So please, if you like them the way I do, share them with your friends! Spread the good word of love. (:

Thank you all, so much, for your love and support! Forever yours, Me. (:

I want to teach.

Watch this video. It is a video of Taylor Mali's poem, "What Teacher's Make." It's edited, you can find the unedited version on youtube. I was trying to be somewhat censored. (:



I love this poem.

Taylor Mali is so inspiring. I've always wanted to teach, always. I have tried to deny that fact often, for whatever reason. I didn't want to do that much schooling, they don't make enough, whatever. It doesn't matter. I do want to teach. And accepting that fact is hard. It won't be the easiest future, it won't make me rich. But I think I would be happy. I think about being a part in forming the next generation, giving them hope, helping them grow, and I get so excited! I feel like I could do it, and do a good job of it.

Teaching is so sacred to me. I feel like they have such an important role in life.. Something anyone should be honored to do. I love it. Everyone has that one teacher they loved, the teacher that changed them. I want to be that teacher. I want to get emails from students long since gone that tell me how their life is going and how much I helped them. I feel like that would be so rewarding.

I want to matter in the life of others.

And I want to do that by making them feel like they matter.

I think it's a good plan. (: Don't you?

I thought I wanted the World to Know..

I thought I wanted every single person on this Earth to know. I wanted to paste it all over the internet, hang a banner from my window, put a bumper sticker on my car. I wanted to tell every person I met, whether they asked about it or not. I wanted my very soul to shine it through, for everyone to see it in my eyes. I wanted my heart on my sleeve.

But now..

Now, I couldn't be more glad I was cautious. I want to sit, in quiet reflection, and be thankful. Thankful it was slow, and sweet. Thankful I kept it close, and hidden, and safe. And that the world doesn't know. Because if the world knew, they would ask. And wonder. And pry. I don't want them to wonder. I want to smile, and dance, and laugh. I don't want a single soul to think there is a reason I shouldn't, because there isn't. Even if the world doesn't know, I really am happy. Happy I made the right decision, even if it felt like the wrong one. Happy you made the right decision, too. And I will see you, and smile, and it will be just like it was before. There is nothing to be afraid of, nothing to worry about. We will be okay.

Even if I thought, for a minute, I might love you.. We both knew it couldn't be. There were no expectations, no promises, we did nothing wrong. Everything was in order. I didn't tell a  single soul how I thought I felt, because I knew all this. Only now, when we're through, can I admit it to myself. And only a little. It was a maybe, a possibly, not a surety. How I felt no longer matters. And truly, leaving you now, could have been the best thing for both of us. I believe it was. Before we got too attatched, before we changed too much. You're still in my life, and you're still so important to me. But we made the right decision.

You'll never know what you did for me. You made me think.. About myself, about my future, about the world around me. You talked to me, forced me to have my own opinions, and to back them up. You helped me realize so much about myself. You were the best thing for me.

Now that part of our lives is over, but I will take that with me. I will keep the sense of self you unkowingly helped me find. And I will be better for it.

I can't wait to see you tomorrow.

Not because I miss you, though I do, but because you are my friend. My wonderful, amazing friend. And I will be grateful always for the friend I've found in you.

(: xo.

 

update: i was completely full of it when i wrote this. i was not happy, but i was trying to convince myself i was/ could be. but i fixed it. i righted the wrong. and now we're happy. (: i can't believe i almost let myself lose the most amazing man i have ever met. a special thank you to lisette. she really saved us. and i am.. happy. (:

Dancing with Batman. (:

A lot has been going on! Stella broke, Stella was fixed. I forgot to do my budget for finance, got asked by the cute kid in social dance for my number, fought with my brother, my parents, my cat, got sick, got better, work, work, work, and school, of course. I've seen the movie Red, watched the Crazies yesterday, Despicable Me again. I haven't read in who knows how long. And that's not even the half of it!! But quite obviously, this post is about Batman, and things that have happened with him. Let's start with October 29th.
That was the Neon Night for SLCC. It was a blast! Glow sticks, black lights, music. I went with Lisette and her buddy Tanner. We met Batman and his friends there. Before I go on, let me just say: Batman does not do hip hop. He doesn't know how to dance to it. But he does anyway, which is part of why I like him so much! He's really quite hysterical. (: We were there for probably an hour and a half. Then Batman and his trusty sidekick, partner in crime(or heroic-ness), Robin(haha! That code name totally made itself up.) came over to Lisette's with us, where we watched When in Rome. Super funny movie! Batman and I cuddled on the couch, and it was beautiful. That boy has some safe arms.
The next night was fake- Halloween. What I like to call a Utah holiday. Batman came to our traditional family chili with me. It was great! Everyone seemed to like him, and he definitely liked all of them. He just sat in his chair like a good boy(haw, haw) and watched. I love the fact that he doesn't need to be right with me every single second. He didn't mind that I was across the room. He paves his own path in every social situation, making friends with everyone, just being an all-around sweetie. He fit in great in my opinion.
Side note- I saw my "long lost" uncle that night!! And met his super cute son. But again, that's not what this post is about. Just haaaad to say it. (:
After chili and going to my house for a bit, we went party hopping with his awesome group of friends. And I'm tellin ya, the parties just got better!! We only went to three, but that was plenty. I was dressed as a go-go girl, and my wig came off at the second party. You just can't dance with a bright pink bob! I met some amazing people, and did some dancing of course. But things really got going at the last party. The basement was set up JUST for dancing! And dance we did!! Foreeeever. It was awesome. There was a black light, so everyone was glowing, and there were so many fun people. It was just goofy, and silly, and LOUD. I loved every second of it. That night seemed to go on and on and on. I think I got home around 2:30. Fabulous.
Tuesday night, November 2nd. Neon Trees came to SLCC!! They are one of my favorite bands. I went with TL and Lisette of course. And we met Batman and his group there, too. Actual conversation between Batman and I:
Him: You gotta save us space!
Me: Okay, but the floor will fill up quick, so you have to hurry.
Him: Alright, save room for... (counting under his breath) Nine.
Me: Nine?!
Him: Yup! We'll be there soon!
Seriously. I didn't know what to think. Like it was the easiest thing in the world to save room for nine people to stand together at a concert that was getting packed. But.. I did it!! :D Guess it wasn't so hard after all. I'm just a drama queen. (:
The concert was amazing, and so was Batman. We all had ten tons of fun- plus some! I heard a couple songs I had never heard before- which got me really excited. (New album?? Cross your fingers!) After the concert, everyone went to Yogurtland. Why? Because it's delicious! Soo much fun. I love my friends.
And finally, last night. Thursday, November 4th. We went DANCING. Batman and his huuuge group, and Lisette and I. I have to say, I LOVE the swing. And that's what it was! For four hours last night, it was the swing. And it was amazing. I got butterflies everytime Batman dipped me, or kissed my cheek, or spun me around. I learned new moves from dancing with other people, got to see Lisette meet new people and have this wonderful new experience, and I was able to let go of everything for those few hours and just have fun. It was wonderful. It definitely needs to become a regular thing for me. The downside? I am going to be so sore, it won't even be funny! But it was worth it. (:
So there's my spill about what Batman and I have been up to. I hope that sates your thirst for gossip(you know who you are.) And if you don't know me at all, and you're reading these very words, I commend you on getting through what was probably a very dull post!! I will leave you all with these words from a movie I have not seen:
Dancing is a conversation between two people. Talk to me.
Adieu!!

Super quick catch-up post!

I have to hurry and strikethrough:
Visit another country and
Go on a cruise AND
Go out dancing!!!
The first two were a given- I posted about the cruise. I just never threw in the official crossing-off-the-list thang. (; But you haven't yet heard about dancing!!
Batman. Baatmaaan. Met him in my country western dance class. He's a total sweetheart. (: He took me rock climbing with his friends(me! Rock climbing!), and then he played the piano for me and maaade(; me sing with him, and then he took me to cafe rio for dinner, and then we went out dancing. Weird.. Our date was less than a week ago. I feel as though it's been forever. We've seen each other outside of class twice since the date. And it was not enough! But this is about the dancing, for my list, not about that darling boy.
Dancing was amazing!! Studio 600 does country dancing Tuesday and Thursday nights. 8-9 they actually have lessons. We got there around 8:40, so we got to learn a couple new moves. The "sexy dip," and a lift. We totally got it down! We left at about 11:30. Seriously, almost THREE HOURS of dancing! Not too many breaks. And western swing takes MAJOR energy. It was rad. (: Definitely has to happen again!!

Let me sneak this in here: on facebook, there's been some major butting of heads about a talk at Mormon conference this weekend. Boyd K. Packer said some things about homosexuality that did not need to be said. I really have not minded defending it on just about every status I've commented on. It's something of a headache, but then I think.. I would almost loove to be hated for something I believe in. Why?
Because that means that I believed in something strongly enough for someone else to know, and care. And that matters. Because when that person hates you, they are going to help the people that don't hate you find you, and support you. They will make you famous. I desperately want to believe something strongly enough that it's well known, that someone considers me a threat. I want to be that inspiration for those that are afraid to voice their opinion.
-sigh- I'm a little dramatic.